If I hadn’t seen him give most of his salary
away. If he hadn’t fired me on a flimsy pretext
and given my job to her. If he hadn’t
abandoned me when I had a fever to spend
the night with her and her daughter… I would
never have believed it was the same man.
I took a deep breath. I told myself, the job’s
gone, this man doesn’t care about you. Let it
- go. Wallowing in self–pity wasn’t going to get
L
me anywhere. I needed to find a way to
survive. Mark used to be my whole world. But
from now on, I was living for myself.
With that decided, I devoured my dinner and
went to our room to check our supplies. No
job, and a husband who gave most of his
money to another woman… I needed to know
exactly what I had left. I couldn’t starve. I
finished my meal, absentmindedly, and
washed the dishes. Of course, I couldn’t go
through our finances with Mark around. But
that was fine, Sarah would probably call him
over with some excuse about her daughter
soon enough. I’d just wait.
But as soon as I reached our room, Mark
followed me.
“Lucy,” he said. “Are you angry?”
<
Angry? I scoffed. Did he think I was made of
stone? Was any of what he was doing even
remotely okay?
“Don’t be angry,” he continued. “Before David
died, he made me promise to take care of
Sarah and Lily.”
“David was my best friend. It’s not easy for
Sarah, a single mother with a child. I have to
look out for them.”
David, Mark’s childhood friend, had died of
tuberculosis six months ago. He’d married a
woman who’d never had to work a day in her
life. After he died, Sarah and her daughter
were left with nothing. Mark was devastated
when he saw Sarah, dressed in rags, doing
laundry for other people in the freezing cold.
Her daughter was sick, and they couldn’t even
<
“David treasured her. To see her reduced to
this, I felt like I was failing him,” Mark said,
his eyes filled with pity, perhaps without even
realizing it, for Sarah. I was glad I was already
over him. If I still loved him, seeing him like
this would have shattered me.
I asked him coldly, “So you give her most of
your salary?”
“So you felt so sorry for her that you left me
with a fever to take care of them all night?”
“So you fired me to give her my job?”
Mark’s face hardened. Then he tried to
reason with me, “You made a scene, which
cost her her laundry job. How could she
support her child then? I gave her your job to
make it up to her. Was I wrong?”
<
“You say I abandoned you while you were
sick. You didn’t tell me you were sick! And
even if you were, why didn’t you go to the
doctor? Am I a doctor? You keep saying
there’s something going on between us. Have
you considered her reputation? How she
would feel?”
“I cost her her job? How much did she even
make doing laundry? Weren’t you already
supporting them with our food stamps every
month?”
“Now she has not only half our income but
also my job, and you’re talking about
reputation?”
