Chapter 6
I used to wonder just how unremarkable I must seem in Daniel Wells‘ eyes, for him to be so reluctant to admit it.
Love is hard to hide, really. Just like how I never said “I love Daniel Wells,” yet the flush in my ears and the rapid beat of my heart had already given me away.
My marriage to Daniel Wells lasted for four whole years.
Though I have a somewhat people–pleasing personality, if he had never given me any hope, I wouldn’t have lasted that long.
When exactly he started liking me, and how much he liked me, I never knew.
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I just inherited the habits of my
grandmother’s generation–when something was broken, my first reaction wasn’t to toss it away and get a new one, but to stitch it up and make do with it.
I applied the same thinking to my marriage.
I thought maybe Daniel Wells didn’t hate me that much, so if I tried a little harder, could this marriage improve?
I desperately tried to find traces of his love for me, then attempted to piece together those scattered feelings, hoping they would light the way forward.
But eventually, I lit the path.
This path was rough, bumpy, and full of an unbearable stench.
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That affection wasn’t enough to keep me moving forward, nor could it bring me warmth. It only made me see more clearly how unbearable this marriage was.
“I used to wonder if maybe your sense of morality was so strong that you couldn’t accept loving anyone other than Esme Bellamy.”
“But then I thought, if your morality was that strong, how could you still have an ambiguous relationship with your first love after knowing you were already married?”
“Truth is, you were just selfish.”
“You even have to use George Wells missing me as an excuse to try and get back
together.
“But Daniel Wells, we’ve been divorced for
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four years.”
Daniel Wells swallowed hard, his voice hoarse as he asked, “So, I’m too late, right?”
“It’s not that you’re too late.” I sighed softly. “It’s just that all of that is in the past now.”
“Daniel Wells, look forward.”
Daniel Wells raised his hand, covering his
eyes.
I knew his pride.
Seeing him in such a sorry state didn’t bring me any satisfaction.
So, I quietly stood up and left him alone in that small world.
Before I left, he reached out and grabbed the
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hem of my dress.
His grip was tight, fingers white, veins bulging.
He had lost a lot of weight, and there was a weariness to him that he couldn’t hide. I heard him sob quietly, saw his trembling shoulders.
“Don’t come back again” I said. “Go back to your own life, take George Wells with you.”
I yanked my dress back, smoothing it out. “Forgot to tell you, my birthday now is the anniversary of our divorce.”
It was also the day I found Sarah. She didn’t know her own birthday, and I wanted to give myself a new one. So we decided to make that day a new beginning for both of us.
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Lopes for you be
& Ponts
“Consider it an early birthday gift from you. Give me some peace.”
“Daniel Wells, thank you.”
Daniel Wells left, taking George Wells with him.
He didn’t say a word, but George Wells seemed to guessed it. Before they left, he clung to my leg with all his might, refusing to let go.
He cried bitterly, his voice shrill and hoarse, his face flushed red, choking on sobs as though he might collapse any moment.
“I won’t go! Let go of me! I want Mommy!”
He struggled desperately, pleading with me.
“Mom, please don’t make me go!”
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“I’ll be good, I’ll listen, I won’t make you sad anymore. Please don’t send me away!”
“Daddy, you’re a liar! You said Mommy would forgive me! You big liar! You bad guy! Go away!”
“Mommy–Mommy-”
The car door slammed shut, and I saw
George Wells crying, pounding on the window with all his might, looking at me with pleading eyes.
Daniel Wells grabbed him and pulled him away, holding him tightly. In a low, commanding voice, he ordered the driver, “Go!”
He didn’t look back at me–not once, from start to finish.
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Sarah stood by my side, gazing at me with wide eyes.
“What’s wrong?” I looked down and asked her gently.
“They won’t come back, right?”
“Mm, they won’t.”
“Mom, are you sad?”
I just smiled and rubbed her head.
“Sarah, everything will pass.”
“Remember, no matter how hard life gets, if you keep moving forward with all your strength and don’t look back, you’ll always make it through.”
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I had already moved on a long way, but it seemed Daniel Wells and his family were still stuck in the past.
But it didn’t matter. We were never meant to walk the same road, so there was no need to stop and wait for them.
That night, I had a dream.
In the dream, I was back to a few years ago, when George Wells had just been born.
I was so exhausted from taking care of him that I unknowingly fell asleep on the sofa.
In my drowsy state, it was Daniel Wells, who had come home late from work, gently lifting me up, carrying me upstairs, and carefully laying me on the bed.
He brushed the hair from my forehead and
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placed a soft kiss on my skin.
“Goodnight, my wife.”
Back then, I truly believed that I could spend my life with him.
But later, I understood–life is too long, and no one can accompany another for the entire journey.
He was my passerby, a vivid brushstroke in the calm of my life.
But that’s all he was.
Daniel Wells, you and I–long ago, we had already come to the end of our story.
